Gregg Koskela, the lead pastor of Newberg (Ore.) Friends Church until last year, has a heart-felt piece about learning how to listen to abuse stories:
For us who’ve walked this road (ourselves or with others), it all fits with the world we now live in, the one where our eyes have been opened and our hearts are filled at times with despair. This is the world where abuse happens, where perpetrators so often get away with it, where it’s so hard to risk revealing it, where we see with crystal clarity that if you do disclose, the questions and doubts and the character assassination will overwhelm.
https://greggkoskela.org/2018/09/27/self-reinforcing-cycles/