Here’s a sobering factoid: one of the more Googled search terms bringing people to Friends Journal is “Why I left the Quakers.”
They find two things. The first match is a 22-year-old article from Jack Powelson, “Why I am Leaving Quakers.” He notes the political diversity of the Quakers he joined in the 1940s and bemoans that “over the years, unprogrammed Quakers have narrowed their views”:
Back in 1943, as many Republicans sat in the benches as Democrats, and meeting was a place for the spiritual enrichment of persons of all political beliefs; even soldiers in uniform came to meeting. If the spirit of the 1940s existed now, right-to-lifers might today sit next to pro-choicers, each being equally blessed in the eyes of God. With the spiritual under-girding of the meeting, different political beliefs would be advocated in secular organizations.
I think it worthwhile to note that when Jack wrote his own obituary(!), he still identified as a Friend. This is not atypical. I can quickly think of a half-dozen people who have publicly left Quakers but are still active in Quaker social media spaces. I’m really grateful for that, as many of them are personal friends, mentors, and inspirations and I appreciate their perspective on the Quaker dramas of the day. Quaker spiritual principles aren’t really that unique and it’s quite possible to follow them outside of Quaker religious bodies and these nominally ex-Quakers show how this can be done.
The second FJ article that those searching for “why I left Quakers” turn up is Betsy Blake’s 2013 “Quakerism Left Me.” I’m a big Betsy Blake fan and worked on her as editor on this article. I know it was brave to write and that she got some serious pushback after publication. She too was talking of polarization:
We knew we would be affected by a divisiveness that we did not experience and found contrary to the forgiveness and peacemaking that we were being taught. Though younger, we did sympathize. We too had dealt with conflicts, fights, bullying, and popularity contests. We knew enough to know that there was passion and genuine care among the adults, mixed in with something that was telling them to cut off their brothers and sisters in Christ.
Betsy of course wasn’t declaring that she herself was leaving. The polarizations she spoke of soon led to schisms in both the Indiana yearly meeting of her youth and the North Carolina (FUM) of her teen years. I don’t know Betsy’s formal membership status nowadays but she’s active on Quaker social media. (Professionally, she designs websites nowadays and offers a template for Quaker meetings that looks great. I would totally recommend her if you’re looking to revamp your site!)
Another data point in all this might be George Amoss Jr.’s recent blog post, “Leaving Liberal Quakerism: What Love Would Have Me Do.”
George talks about by the “exacerbated” “self-righteousness” he’s encountered:
The proximate cause of that alienation is the adoption among Liberal Friends of sociopolitical ideologies that I find reductive, dishonest, divisive, and destructive, leading even to the defense of violent crime. But that, at least in its current extreme form, is a recent development, facilitated by the fundamental unsoundness of contemporary beliefs.
Friends are a big, messy group of people with all sorts of opinions. While we can agree on broad principles (racism bad, peace good), it’s rare to develop a real sense of unity on either analysis or strategy. We should of course thresh out issues; interest sub-groups of like-minded individuals can build momentum and do a lot of good within both our religious society and in the greater world. If we can tolerate this messy diversity in our meetings, then our shared community can be great incubators for something more radical than itself. With time and spiritual discernment the radical position can become mainstream among Friends.
I do see some Friends nowadays trying to press for more ideological conformity than actually exists. The ever-interesting and challenging Adria Gulizia has a long comment on George’s Amos post about trying to reconcile Quaker beliefs with an antiracism statement being considered by New York Yearly Meeting. She concludes: “But what some of us have learned is that, while the stakes could not be higher, it is not in victory but in the struggle itself that we find our blessing, that in facing our reckoning with faith and courage, we may be strengthened and deepened and transformed, not just as individuals but as a people of faith.”
I hope we can continue to respect the diversity and messiness of Liberal Friends.
As I see it, the purpose of Quaker community is the spiritual and community part of our work. Our specific political languages and analyses will evolve and change every decade or so; what I hope will remain constant is our desire for truth, our reliance on the Holy Spirit for guidance, and our genuine love of neighbors in all their contradictions and messiness. In 2006 Paul Buckley wrote The Temptation to Do Something: A Quietist Perspective, that I think speaks to some of this.
I do hope George Amoss finds a way to stay engaged with Friends.